As I understand it, the question is asked in a global way and you are asking about your existence in this disgusting world filled with disgusting people .

It's a difficult question, and everyone finds the answer to it for themselves, but the most obvious answer is to live . If you were already born, live. You didn't ask for it, you didn't want it, it didn't depend on you at all, and here you are, alive. Try to realize the opportunity you have received to realize it to the maximum, make it so that there is a goal, set for yourself what you would go to, then the motivation to live appears(I really hope that this was the question). It will be hard to get drunk, the will to live is very good at suppressing the desire for suicide, so you don't have many options(to die now or later), but there are plenty of opportunities to live with dignity, you can live like a hedonist, like a misanthrope, become a philosopher or an alcoholic( not good, but no one forbids it), you are free to do what human laws allow and