Why is love only a source of pleasure for people, but not a responsibility?
People talk a lot about love, but not everyone needs it, many need only carnal pleasures and benefits, but they don't want to change themselves for the sake of others, maybe it's better to be more honest and say that the union is for personal gain? And not some kind of love. Because it's hard work to change yourself for someone else, like work.
Because people do not understand love as you and I do: that is, not the desire for self-improvement and improvement of the other…
In most cases, love is simply confused with sexual desire.
A little more information on this topic can be found here:
Talking about love
“People talk a lot about love, but not everyone needs it.”
People talk a lot, have spoken and will continue to talk just because they need love! But few people understand this gift of God, and therefore do not know what to do with it and use it as a “monkey and glasses”. Duties, responsibilities, duty and all the like are not love, but a human attitude to this feeling, which is different for everyone, as people themselves are different. If a person values this feeling, values the relationship, the person he loves, who gives him something and so much like no one else, then he will cherish it with all his might, without any duty, as his greatest value, as something fragile that can break at any moment and disappear because a person does not have power over him.
And if a person is told about the responsibility and duty for this feeling, these are the shackles that they are trying to put on something that cannot live without freedom and that makes a terrible monster out of the miracle of the divine gift.
What makes you think that love is a willingness to change yourself?
If two people have met, got to know each other, which usually takes quite a long time, and realized that something does not suit them, then what kind of love is it? Here, perhaps, a strong sympathy or the same carnal attraction, some people may mistake this for love and already on the basis of these feelings are ready to build a family relationship with a person, which in most cases leads to divorce.
You can really fall in love only with a person who will already fit all the criteria of the “ideal”, will like both externally and internally, with similar views, goals, with a suitable character set, and all this should work in both directions. In order for a person to change, he needs to do a lot of work on himself, but nevertheless, if he really loves, then he will go for it on his own or at least for a long time it will not be necessary to ask him. In all other cases, it is a pointless waste of time and nerves.
If they say to me: “Until you change , I will not love you”, I will immediately understand that this is not my person and I will move on with a calm soul, and I will do the same if I don't like something in someone. This is the most logical decision in my opinion.