2 Answers

  1. Приходилось�— both in the role of the Persecutor (aka the Executioner), and in the role of the Victim, and in the role of the Savior. In general, in Karpman's theory, it is believed that the role of the Victim is the most comfortable, and the whole triangle is based on this role and serves to achieve it, because everyone feels sorry for the Victim.�

    In my life, the triangle is usually played out in situations of communication with peers (they are given to me many times harder than communicating with older people): my mind instantly flashes back to the failures in this kind of communication that have haunted me since my early childhood, and I irrationally begin to think that this time everything will not end as I would like. And then the role of the Victim automatically turns on: I start talking about my problems and naively expect that there will be a Savior who will understand my pens and say something like ” Stop worrying, you're your own person.” However, I'm usually told exactly the opposite, which is why I turn on the Stalker: “What the hell is this rabble of idiots, pests x you, all they do is poison my life.” Previously, even before this, I included the Savior: here, let me help you, and you will become my friends. It all ended about the same way, as in that joke: “So sit like a fool, without a gift.”

    All three roles are neurotic roles, and none of them can be truly comfortable, as my long-term practice of walking through these triangles of Karpman has shown. Yes, being a victim seems to be beneficial, but only at first� – who wants to be humiliated with pity forever? Stalker-it seems cool, but it's impossible to be on the lookout all the time and look for the guilty ones in order to perform the action “I take revenge, and my revenge is terrible”on them. The role of the Savior helps to feel its value, but again for a short period of time: it was Christ who could allow himself to be crucified for the sins of all people (which is why the Russian Orthodox Church calls him the Savior), but we are mortal people and sometimes have to take care of ourselves, and not just about other peaks of the dramatic triangle.

    The formation of normal interpersonal relationships is possible if and only if their participants stop looking for the most comfortable role in the Karpman triangle and give up all three roles at once; they stop blaming responsibility on others and take it on themselves (more precisely, on their “adult” part of the personality). It is not so easy to do this (I have been on this path for several years), but this is the key to a quality life-without unnecessary conflicts, neuroses, depressions and suicides.

  2. If the “drama triangle” model is meant here, then choosing between these roles is like choosing between a pit with stakes and a moat with crocodiles. If you think that you are leaning towards something, run to a psychologist.

    In my case, the role of the executioner was associated with a monstrous black guilt, because I Hurt My Friend And Do Not Know How To Stop, and I was the victim (is it?) in your family, that is, with a deep, heh, immersion. Guilt, panic, parents in nightmares, in general, also absolutely nothing good.

    (You can also tell a lot about my triumph as a lifeguard, but that's not the question. In any case, if you are leaning towards something, run to the therapist. Peace.)

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