9 Answers

  1. Kristina, in order not to be shy about communicating with people and accepting yourself, it is important to first understand what causes you to reject yourself.

    Most often, these are attitudes and beliefs that a person has absorbed from his environment since childhood.

    Therefore, the first step is to understand your self-esteem. I'll tell you how to do this in more detail in this video: https://youtu.be/C212Bua1zIQ

    The second step is to start developing self-love. As strange as it may sound, but not accepting yourself is just a sign of such dislike.

    To do this, we remove all obstacles and develop new behavioral scenarios so that we can not only take care of ourselves, but also have a positive view of ourselves, appreciate and respect our personality. Learn more about this in my video: https://youtu.be/koP3Gt71UDM

  2. I don't see any contradiction. Just when you accept yourself for who you are, you stop being ashamed (shy) live. To live as you really are. Here I am beautiful, and here opposite. Although, perhaps, you will like both, and what do I decide for you?!.

    The fantasy that “I should only be beautiful” wildly binds any upright, tailless creature.

    “I am, here I am, I'm not beautiful, but I'm good enough!” is the key to communication, giving yourself permission.

    Today I spent six sessions with clients as a psychotherapist.

    I told: “I don't know.” And he said that right now he was giving advice that was inappropriate: Well, I started to build communication in the wrong way, and I said so. And I said that I can give an outside view, but this is not the opinion of the “science of psychology”, the view will be subjective.

    That is, now, I can be imperfect, and then explicitly admit it. And I'm also good enough at communicating with them so that they keep meeting me and pay me money.

    This is the answer to your question.

    How to become more sociable, do not hesitate to communicate with people. And (!!!) accept yourself for who you are.

  3. First of all, you need to find as many of your own people as possible. With the same interests as you. You're not alone. Go to forums and interest groups. Start writing comments. When they start answering you, try to invite them to the BOS to chat and get acquainted.

    There are many communities where you can work together on different subjects. Going to school with your head helps a lot. Because at the Olympics they see the same themselves. Shy nerds. But they are respected in the classroom, in school, and in the city..

    In general, the bot brings you closer))

    And shy is normal, she is like that. Introvert with all strangers. But an extrovert with his own))

  4. Shyness has its advantages. It helps you think before you say something, often such people are very observant and know how to listen. I've learned that shyness isn't a sentence, and you can make it work for you.✓
    ✓ To start, just smile and say “hi”. This immediately disposes to itself. ✓ ✓ Try to listen carefully to what others are saying to you.⠀
    Watch how sociable people talk. Something you might want to make a note of. ✓
    ✓ People like to share their opinions, so the best way to start a conversation is to ask their opinion about something. 🗣️⠀
    Remember, if people are comfortable with you, they will love you, even if you are shy. Smile sincerely. There's something interesting about everyone, including you. 😊

  5. Practice will save you. I know a lot of people who in order not to complex went to the area where just need to communicate.

    when you communicate with people for 12 hours a day, it's not up to that anymore.

  6. No matter how it may sound, but in order not to be shy about communicating with people, you need to communicate with people.

    Perhaps you think that any spoken word will be perceived by others as nonsense.

    But in reality, each person cares only about himself.

    Try to remember how someone you know said something obviously stupid. It's not that simple. Because we quickly forget it.

    You have the right to say what you think and how you can.

    If you feel that it is difficult to communicate with certain people, they cause you negative emotions, it is better to avoid such people.

  7. Both yes and no. In the head, you need to try to fit and accept some contradictions. On the one hand, to appreciate and respect yourself for who you are, especially so that other people feel it. The one who does not like himself usually and other people do not really like. On the other hand, you need to remember your weaknesses, shortcomings and shortcomings. Because they are worth remembering in order to eliminate them and develop further. And if you are already talking to someone, then at this moment you should not fool yourself and think about your shortcomings, you need to feel confident. For example, in front of other people, such an attitude: “It's not your problem that you're overweight, but the problem of those who don't like it, and you're already attractive.”

    And then you can get busy and fix what's bothering you.

  8. I'll be honest, trying to change yourself won't get you anywhere. Some people are modest, but I am also modest. It's okay, it sometimes gets in the way, but sometimes it even plays a plus for us) So don't worry)

  9. It seems to me that there is no universal recipe to relax.
    But if you think about it, then you need to look for your own way. Life will be easier.)))
    I will say about myself, I was very reserved. A few steps have helped me become more sociable:
    First, I started reading books, thereby allowing my horizons to develop, that is, I got a wider range of topics for communication.
    Second I started to study the psychology of human behavior and its body movement. After that, I realized that people also hide their feelings and fears. And I also realized that I am no worse than others, I stopped being shy about myself.
    And then I went to work in technical support. But I couldn't work there for long. At first it was interesting, I forced myself to learn to finally communicate, I thought how to remove the mask of shyness with my hand, but I was wrong, then I was disgusted with excessive communication.
    To sum up: I learn to overcome the threshold of constraint in communication with less internal effort(I have not lost complete constraint and fear – it seems to me that it does not go away). After that, new acquaintances and interests appeared.

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