9 Answers

  1. There are many definitions of love, and they are all accurate in their own way. Yes, and you can specify them endlessly. Let's put it in simple words- Love is a feeling of deep positive attraction to a person. Let's clarify it, love for a real person with whom you are in a relationship! This is a very important clarification. Love as writers describe to a person with whom there is no relationship for a long time, in fact, is no longer love for a person, but love for an image in your head that has nothing to do with reality. This is a terrible condition that condemns a person to long suffering. My colleague will tell you how to get out of this state, stop loving and forget: https://yandex.ru/q/question/chto_delat_esli_ne_mozhesh_zabyt_11_let_i_5fb58840/?answer_id=503abe7e-291f-4d96-b738-47606ac7d9a7

    Let's talk about love when two people live together. What is the secret to long-term marriages in which people are happy? What rules and algorithms do you need to follow to maintain a long-term relationship? You may ask why the rules, why the algorithm? Why put such a bright and joyful feeling in the framework of an algorithm? Yes, everything is very simple love also obeys certain laws, ignorance of which does not exempt from responsibility. Moreover, we are happy to recognize the need that, for example, you need to learn to drive a car and pass it for a license. But no one teaches you how to live in a relationship or takes the exam for the right to start a family. As a result, we have not comforting statistics where 70% of marriages break up, and note for yourself that most of them break up for far-fetched subjective reasons, that is, people could well live together further. There were no physical assaults, infidelities and other tinplate, but the marriage still failed.

    T ak, what helps to live together for many years, what are the basic principles? I'll give them here:

    The main principle of a long-term relationship is to focus on the partner, sincerely share their interests and aspirations, and sincerely want to make their life better. If you think only of yourself and are engaged in contemplating your navel, the other partner will soon get tired of it.

    Do not try to merge with your partner, you are not two halves (as romantic as it sounds) you are two independent individuals living together. If you consider the other person as your soulmate, you will have the illusion :” what is good for me is good for the partner” and this will quickly push him away.

    Communication without accusations. Understanding that by blaming someone else, we give them control of their life. Stand firmly on your feet, lean on yourself and everything will work out.

    A joint or transparent budget, both partners must understand where the family is moving financially and coordinate large acquisitions.

    Sleep together, even if you've built a big house and have your own bedroom-different bedrooms, different lives.

    Shared vacation. This does not mean that you can not let your wife go to her mother and her husband go fishing, do not forget that the spouses should have private time, but it is desirable to spend most of the vacation together.

    Perhaps these are 6 basic rules that will help you love each other all your life. And do not forget that in long marriages, the eye can get blurry and the partners do not realize their love. But there are so many cases around when an elderly partner dies and the second one dies less than a year later, even though everyone thought that there was no love there, but it was there and did not go away! People carried it with them to the end!

    I wish you all the best and love for the rest of your life!

  2. Love is a dopaminergic goal-setting motivation to form stable pair bonds.

    Love is a feeling of deep sympathy, attachment and aspiration for another.�

    Love is a combination of intimacy, passion, and commitment.

    This is how love is defined by different people of different worldviews and professions from different fields of knowledge, but each of these definitions is united by the ideas of pairing, sensuality and stability. In systems theory, there is such a concept as emergence — the property of a system to give rise to properties that are not inherent in its individual parts, just as a clock gives rise to the property of measuring time, which its gears and springs are not capable of separately.

    Nothing in these definitions and nothing in my personal and universal historical experience says that it is impossible to love someone or something all my life. If nothing prevents the formation of a connection, if nothing breaks the connection, if the connection is based on mutual respect, mutual understanding and passion, then such a connection should not disappear.

    Yes, we find many examples of how small squabbles and heavy quarrels destroyed relationships, but did they destroy love? Love is like an earthquake-proof building built on a mobile foundation: if the earthquake does destroy it, it means that mistakes were made during the construction, and if something destroys the relationship, it means that it wasn't love.

    Yes, we know about people who have a hard time building monogamous relationships, but does this contradict their love? Love does not have to be directed only to one, no one says this directly in their definition of love, love can be directed to several, and even in this case it can be mutual and respectful, if each participant in such love recognizes its right to exist and respects it in turn, otherwise it is not love.

    Yes, love may not last a lifetime, but only if something significant gets in the way of it, something that its powers are not designed for: unbearable betrayal, deception, lack of experience, weakness of emotional and social intelligence, lack of loyalty, lack of mutual understanding, which can accompany inexperienced love… or a second love that excludes the first. But that doesn't mean that love can't last a lifetime.

    We are deceived by the lie that love lives for three years or partners cool down with time, although this is not true — we are deceived because we call love something that is not it. We attach too much importance to falling in love, passion, friendship, and responsibilities that are not bound together by the ties of love itself, and we place too much hope on them, but we forget that all these things in isolation from each other can not live long if we give out wishful thinking.

    True love can last a lifetime. Just call it love.

  3. Love is first of all to accept a person as he is! Don't try to change it or adjust it to your expectations! This is when in a relationship you can be yourself, completely open up to another person. When in a relationship you feel comfortable, calm and safe and you are just happy that you have found each other.

    Is it possible to love one person all your life?

    I think this is exactly what you should strive for when entering into a marriage. And at first it seems simple and natural, but from my work experience I can say that everything can happen on the path of life and only a mutual conscious desire to be with the chosen person will help you go through this path to the end together.

  4. Love is a certain departure from the state of “I” and transition to the state of “We”. Another question is that he is not always happy and the way the lover himself would like to see him.

    “To love one person all your life” — let's try to understand: in what cases is this possible? — Often it is a connection of not even one life, but something that has flown in from the past in the form of some global task. Of course-it is possible for love to be one and for life.

    A person must understand something for himself, somehow grow up, and sometimes, unfortunately, fall in this relationship in order to finally free himself from love, realizing all its problems, and admit it.

    Therefore, love for life-also will not be a guarantee of happiness.

    In general, each story and situation will be individual — to understand everything thoroughly — you should! put everything on the shelves. In love, this is possible. I have repeatedly made such situations more obvious to the person.

  5. I think so, the most striking example is my parents. Yes, relationships change. Perhaps they are moving from a bright passion to a more measured and practical one. But their foundation remains. In addition, people get used to each other, adapt to each other, and in the end it can even be difficult for them without each other. I just think that changing one to another, again, the whole cycle: learning, recognizing and adjusting. The endless repetition of stories and revelations and the amount of time effort and energy spent on one person…repeating it with someone else makes me honestly feel sick.

    In short, I sincerely believe in it. How are we worse than Swans?:)

    We can. Everything depends on us, the desire for strength and sincerity of feelings. And most importantly, mutual faith, which is so real, possible and in general:)

  6. Of course you can. Love.this is not just continuous unbridled sex, as all sorts of Westerners want to instill in us now. Over time, if there is love, it will be replaced by habit. And if you don't, everything disappears. Look for a new love.

  7. I compare love with food, in general not everyone knows how to cook it deliciously, many spoil it, but who can be a real monogamous so it's a narcissist, loves only himself alone, I doubt that there are monogamous people in general, someone loves not only her husband or wife but also parents or brothers, sisters, and someone friends.

  8. Love is the ability to feel and understand another person. The desire to care, to protect – this is love. I believe in love, I believe in once and for life.

  9. So many great and interesting answers on this topic! It seems to me that for every person love is something of their own, internal and everyone feels this feeling in their own way. For me, love is, of course, romance. Such a beautiful feeling, sung by poets and artists, simply has to be inspired and inspire. And of course, this is friendship – common interests, the desire not only to read poetry, but also to communicate on simple human topics, to have fun in each other's company, to joke and understand each other's jokes. And it is also trust – after all, who, if not the best beloved friend, can be trusted with the most intimate secrets and secrets, complain and get support, the knowledge that you will not be abandoned in a difficult moment, that you have someone to take care of if you get sick and cheer up if you are sad. And kinship – after all, love is ideally the first step to creating a strong family. And of course, the ability to accept a person with all his shortcomings and sins, the ability to understand his feelings, the ability to find a compromise without quarrels, the ability to share household responsibilities and provide each other with physical and moral support. But this is all a perfectly balanced relationship, and I doubt that it exists anywhere outside the pages of women's novels.�

    It is difficult to say about the love of one and only one for life, since I have never seen any living examples, despite the fact that I have read a lot about them.

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