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It is scientifically established that in others we are annoyed only by what we subconsciously know about ourselves, but do not want to admit it.
Then the question arises: how can the kindness and politeness that I have in me annoy me? This is nonsense!
Apparently, by kindness and politeness, you do not mean kindness and politeness, but sycophancy and a desire to please the interlocutor at any cost.
True politeness and kindness are first of all self-respect, self-acceptance, and in this context they cannot be annoying
As with all irritants, it is worth looking for the cause of this phenomenon – it can lie both on your side and on the side of your counterpart.
Perhaps you feel insincere, perhaps you think this behavior is strange/self-serving, or you consider yourself not worthy of such an attitude
You can't be too kind or too polite. If you are annoyed by the “kindness” or” politeness ” in the behavior of specific individuals, they may be hypocritical, or this is how their complexes manifest themselves. That is, this is not the true face of these people, but only a mask. Sincere kindness or politeness does not cause irritation, it is unobtrusive and inconspicuous.�
Therefore, the answer is quite simple – do not communicate with those who annoy you, or if this is not possible, minimize contact. Your nerves are more expensive.