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You need to understand that people like to talk about themselves the most, so you can use your silence to your advantage. Write a list of questions that you can ask people based on their gender, age, education, and interests-and just ask questions, and as you listen, you can ask related questions. People like to talk about their hobbies – be genuinely interested, because you can learn a lot of new and interesting things.
A good conversationalist is not one who talks, but one who listens carefully and supports the conversation.
Don't worry that you are silent – when I'm not interested in the company, I just listen and watch, but people tell me so many interesting things that they don't even tell each other :)))
If you really want to connect with people, then I would recommend that you try to overcome this barrier. Gradually increase the conversation time. That is, to approach it as a training exercise. And over time, you will be completely liberated. Good luck!
You need to get a job where one of the main responsibilities is dating and communicating with people. But it is desirable not such violence over yourself as cold calls and sales, but for example, as a bartender.
I worked in a photo / video studio. She held presentations of works, promoted the services of a photographer and videographer. Since my bosses were like family to me, I really liked their work and approach to work – they were not difficult to praise and sell, and our clients were mostly couples in love – it was a great atmosphere where I could improve these very skills without violence.
I also worked in a small online store. She answered calls and placed orders. There were quite a few situations where I did more than I had to. I especially remember a couple of cases where I helped choose shoes for older women. They were very grateful to me. There were a lot more contacts with clients here, and I even had a good experience working with negativity in social networks.�
In both cases, I was helped by the fact that I really liked the services we provide, it was interesting and pleasant for me to tell clients about our work, it was pleasant to help them.
I also worked as a bartender at the Ugly Coyote bar. There I learned to communicate with absolutely any people, even not very adequate ones). We were also allowed to drink for courage)
Don't be shy 😉
If you want to communicate with people, then your head is not empty, you have something to say. Then sort out your feelings: What prevents you from opening your mouth? Most likely, you are afraid to say something wrong, and you think that if this happens, you will not be able to be in society, you will be laughed at/insulted/sent away. And these are quite possible scenarios, but understand a few simple things: there are no perfect people, everyone makes mistakes. Well, you will say something stupid, but who hasn't had such a thing happen? It is ok. And if someone reacts sharply to you, it's not your problem, but that person's. A self-sufficient, confident person will not point fingers at you, insult you, or laugh at you. And no one will listen to this person if you are not in the seventh grade.
Step over your barrier. You may be nervous, but when you make sure that people around you are accepting your opinion normally, you will realize that you shouldn't have kept silent.
Of course, I agree with Dmitry. Think about whether you need all this, maybe that's why it doesn't work because there aren't your people around.
I would advise you to wait for someone with whom it will be easy to communicate, everyone else is not worth the effort, because as the recently popular quote “communication is like sex, the interlocutor also needs to arouse desire otherwise it is violence” so you can try to find the reasons for this problem or just wait for your person, really this is the best that I can advise you. Maybe it's very stupid or even arrogant, but from my own experience, it's worth it, even if it's just one person, for no matter how banal it may sound, it will contain the whole world.
Another question is how not to go crazy from loneliness if such is the case, but I once answered this question, if it is very interesting, you can find it in the answers.