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I would advise you not to get caught up in thoughts about life. The question of the meaning of life is important and important, but the answer to it does not come as a result of intense reflection. The answer will come gradually, in the process. In the meantime, you need to do what you have to do, but you must do it! Out of a sense of duty to your relatives, at least communicate, listen, read, and learn in parallel. And gradually accumulate enough material to make life meaningful.
I understand how you feel, and the only advice I can give you is to try to find answers in books. At least for now, this is the best medicine.�
I advise you to read “Before sunrise” – an autobiographical story by Zoshchenko. In it, Mikhail Mikhailovich shares his thoughts on causeless moping. I am sure that it will help many people with a similar problem.
There's only one way out. Don't think. But for this(sic!) you need to think a little. Stop darting from corner to corner like a caged animal and focus.
Just at one point, you need to stop panicking, sit down calmly, hold your head and start putting everything on the shelves: how did you get to this life, why are you here? Where do you want to go and what do you need? And then the person gets stuck in the most difficult part: very often a person asks himself such questions just to amuse his ego, and the efficiency from them is relatively small. But be honest with yourself, because no matter how strange and unwelcome the answers may seem to you, this is what you are all about. And when you answer everything as honestly as possible for yourself, without hiding behind pretentious tinsel and distant noble illusions,you will understand what you need, where you belong and how to live on. And if you answer all these questions as frankly as possible for yourself and are able to draw conclusions, you will never raise them again.�
I know that now with a high degree of probability they will run in and cover up what I wrote, but in defense of all of the above, I can say that this method helped me personally. All you need is one night alone and maximum honesty. And you will realize that everything is actually much simpler than it seems.�
Good luck to you!
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