6 Answers

  1. I've already answered it somewhere, but I'm afraid I won't find it anymore. This happens when there is a very shaky, elevated, and often unconscious self-image. Not only do difficulties themselves devalue the status of a person (we feel valuable and necessary to this world when we succeed), but also the solution of these difficulties repeatedly hits the illusory sense of self-esteem.

    For example, it is one thing to say that you are fat and treat it as you please, but do nothing about it. And it's completely different to go to the gym, give up a huge amount of delicious food. Zeal in the wildest way humiliates such air structures. And if they are important, you want to avoid your own “humiliation”.

    This is one of the possible reasons. What to do if this is true, I can't really say — we need to figure out what's going on with the personality as a whole. You can only be very stupid and simple: do not be afraid to feel humiliated, if this is the case and this reason is suitable. Well, do-do-do, feeling.

  2. The request is not entirely clear. Giving up on difficulties is one thing. They freeze and hide in danger. These are different situations, and different reactions. And they are born in different parts of the brain.
    This topic itself is worth a lot of review work, but, in short, so, in fact, then go and learn to fight. With my fists and my tongue. And as you develop the necessary skills, when there is a danger, one day, you will feel the desire to resist. So, your arsenal of reactions will be replenished with the desire to fight. And along the way (during training), you will also learn to overcome difficulties.�
    Until then, don't blame your instinct, it keeps you safe.
    (And, if that makes you feel better, in today's society, most people freeze or run when they're in danger. This is the norm for our cultural environment.)

  3. Possible reasons for this behavior may be insecurity and low self-esteem. But in your situation, I think everything is fine. Just the fact that you decided to write here says that you do not give up on difficulties, but are looking for a solution.

    This is most likely your model of behavior in difficult situations – not an explosive reaction, but an attempt to calmly understand and find a solution.

    What to do? It is best to contact a qualified professional who is able to see these features.�

    If you want to do something yourself, then start by determining what kind of reaction you would like to have instead of the one you don't like. Why do you need it? How do you have to be a different person to react in a new way? What will it give you and what will you lose?�

    If you are satisfied with your answers to these questions, then start visualizing yourself as a different person who acts differently in case of difficulties. Be sure to pay attention to what feelings come to you at the same time. If the feelings are unpleasant, then stop and change the new image of yourself and choose a different behavior model.�

    Do this until you feel comfortable in your new role. You may not succeed the first time. Therefore, repeat this exercise if necessary.

    That's all. Good luck to you. Write based on the results 🙂

  4. Perhaps this is due to the fear of responsibility, this happens either when your parents loved you, or when they constantly underestimated you, and you believed it. The brain can't handle these patterns. He needs time to scroll through all these images in his head to assess his capabilities, instead of clearly finding a way in his head to implement what he has planned, and at this point there is a certain stupor. While it is happening, enough time has already passed, and this increases the panic, just in case, so as not to let anyone down, a person would rather refuse than take on the choice.

  5. Someone passes! BUT NOT ME – I'M the same age as ROCK&ROLL!

    For Life-I changed Five (!) – types of money (Englishmen live with their pound for 1000 years)! – social system – Two states and three languages! After that, do you suggest that I “give up” in the face of difficulties? To the one who was born (had a misfortune)- in the USSR!?

    Let the “difficulties” pass before ME!

    1. If you give up on the difficulties of achieving something, then you just don't want it so much. You might think it would be great , but that's all. This is all just a whim for you. You just don't fully associate yourself with the subject of your interest, most likely. If, for example, you really want a car, but do not save up for it, it means that you subconsciously understand that it is quite normal for you to walk, and the car is nothing more than a whim. Because if you, for example, had dreamed all your life of becoming a taxi driver or driver, and this was your passion , then you would have gone to work long ago and saved up for a car as quickly as possible, thanks to natural motivation.
    2. But even if you have such motivation, but you continue to pass, it means that you are just desperate. You may realize that even the simplest goal completion system doesn't work. For example, to get at least some kind of job – you need blat, which you do not have, and if there is, then the job will not be worth the money that they pay there, and if you even close your eyes to it, endure for the sake of a “higher goal”, so to speak, then there is still a possibility that you will simply be deceived in this job, they will not pay extra, they will find any way to do it. And you live in an area where you can't keep the money you earn. As soon as they find out that you have them, your house will be immediately cleaned out. As a result, instead of achieving the goal, you will simply get involved in an unsuccessful gimmick. So maybe you're just doing the sensible thing-not doing anything, instead of pointlessly doing something that doesn't bring results.
      All you need to do is listen to yourself better and understand the nature of your desires, everything that surrounds you, and how to achieve what you really want. And only then will it stop. There's a chance, of course, that you just don't really want anything. You don't really need anything. Then why don't you just accept yourself as such?

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