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I quit smoking, gave up alcohol, moved to another city, started doing what I really like, cut off all old connections and unnecessary acquaintances, stopped doubting the correctness of my actions. And now I'm doing better than ever. In words, all this, of course, is very simple, it turned out to be difficult to create everything around me, but now, when all the hardships of creating a new self and a new life are behind me, I am the happiest person in the world 🙂
I used to have those moments when I wanted to run away from everyone and everything without looking back. I wanted radical changes, so the very first thing I did was change my place of residence. He moved to a big city from his small hometown, where everything seemed to hold: family, friends, work, hobbies. At first, there were problems with money, but, fortunately, everything got better pretty quickly. Over time, there were connections, thanks to which I tripled for a good job, and everything else also tightened up, respectively. Do not be afraid to experiment, you will succeed)
If you take from my personal experience, I change so to speak almost every year. But, the main breakthrough was that I finally decided to accept myself as I am, as well as everything that surrounds me. With the acceptance of yourself in the present tense, the fear of future changes and the opportunity to try something new disappeared, thereby cutting yourself off from the past. A person is de facto afraid of any changes in life, which is why we are used to living in so-called “comfort zones” and do not want to change ourselves as well as our routine in everyday life. But I want to assure you, the most terrible thing is to live without changing anything in your life, knowing that we have only one.
Traveling helped me understand that it's time to change my life. I worked hard, saved money, and saved up to go somewhere. Once she returned home, she began to invest in individual classes in two foreign languages. And then I realized that I don't have enough good education to be happy and communicate with people from different countries. Not to sit in one small town, but to communicate with the whole world. And live all over the world!
It took me several years, a lot of money and a lot of effort to learn languages, get financial opportunities and go to university in another country. The obstacles were primarily monetary, everything is expensive and not all at once. And exams. Visa problems don't count, they were the least difficult.
The main thing is not to give up! And it is important to plan your actions to achieve the goal. By day, by week, by month.
I grew up in the country, in a very ordinary family, until my parents divorced. Since then, the stereotypes that a man will never make a woman happy (yes, yes, and this opinion was maintained before entering university) and also that you need to diversify your life as often as possible have become firmly established in my life. A happy period of moving began – when my mother, my younger sister and I were forced to wander around the city in search of housing. Even then, I was used to constant changes. For better or worse, I still get discouraged by the feeling of monotony.�
My first major change was driven by falling in love in my second year of university – and not with someone else, but with the first handsome man in the faculty. Now I understand that my goal was not to get to know him, but to get him to look in my direction at least!For a
whole year, I was engaged in training and dancing, spent unthinkable sums on outfits. Everyone around me was constantly complimenting me, the positive changes were obvious to me as well – my self-esteem finally rose.�
The irony is that this guy noticed me not because I was pretty or anything, but because … ..As it turned out, he was flirting with two of my friends from the stream (!!!). So, all the dreams collapsed. Prolonged depressions, constant dissatisfaction with oneself and others, and self-eating began. I had a fight with my friends.
But this period set the stage for another significant change – I went on a trip. I felt that this was the only way to hear myself. In two years, India, then the Arab countries-and the changes in appearance were no longer due to any external factors, they were an addition to my changed inner world.
I think that changes come naturally to life when a person hears himself, controls his own life and lives in harmony with the world around him.
I have already told my story here, but considering that I can be some kind of motivation and help, I will tell you again:
I was forced to change by an ex-girlfriend in the heat of saying: you can never change.
I smoked, grew fat, and dropped out of school and books. My character is such that I did not take into account anyone's opinion, I did not have any authorities and I did not hear others, I was very impulsive and often cursed, found fault with everyone.
To calm my anger, when I was running — I ran, climbed on the horizontal bar, in general, did sports, because it helped to cope with all the unpleasant feelings to a greater extent. I quit smoking and started losing weight slowly.
What do I need to change? Decent motivation, rethinking your activities and foresight, oh, yes-the desire to become better, stronger. You have to light up with this, burn like a bonfire, throwing your laziness, fatigue and pride into this fire. Ask why pride? Because pride will make you uncomfortable — fear of experienced guys to do only five laps when they are twenty-five, and so on.
After that, you need to plunge into a previously unknown world — for me, this world was studying, because before that I was on time. (It's a pity that this happened in the last year.)�
I started planning my time: food, a hundred pages of any book, a hundred pages of a study book, and sports in the evenings. And there, the result will not keep you waiting — with each new border there is a desire to live.
However, at a certain moment there will come such a thing as-why do I need it? I've lived well enough as it is. And here is an important technique that will help you: dedication. If you do anything with your soul, you will be drawn in. Well, there is a certain amount of character: I don't want to be worse than others, I want superiority, I don't want to give up what I started. Underline what you need.
And the obstacles are as follows: my friends told me that I was sick, when I laced up my sneakers, when I brought my work to school, I heard the same thing. The weather was also not on my side, as it was February. Sidelong glances of people from the outside. The usual laziness. Lack of any opportunities and most importantly — discouragement. Never in your life give yourself up to despondency, for despondency is the death of activity. Love life and be active.
I forgave my parents;
I stopped blaming myself for past mistakes;
defined your own life values.�
learned to be alone.�
I set myself goals and achieve them;
I notice negative qualities in myself before making a comment to others;
I read and listen to more lectures;
thank you for what you have and don't ask for more;
I am engaged in the development of willpower and self-control;
I refuse criticism, obscenities and envy;
I develop a sense of duty, kindness and a desire to help;
I'm learning to ask for advice and help;
I share my experience with others.
At first there was the sky above me, and below me something like some kind of warm soil. And there was nothing else there… I thought it was bad and said it would be nice to add some light. So my life changed – I was born. I was born at 9 am, it was light. After living the first day, I realized that I would quickly get tired of just the light, so I created night in my world so that it would alternate with day. Wo, I thought, it didn't work out that way! Then I learned to walk, but when I realized that just walking is not cool, my parents took me to the sea. I was 2 years old. Then I realized that land and water are actually a good variety. Then there was grass, trees, and all that… I liked them too. They're so green, they rustle, and apples fall on people's heads. I think it's all good, so be it. Then I think it would not be bad to look through a telescope at night, look at all the stars and the moon, and bask in the sun during the day – I did everything… and so, I looked, it seems to be normal-I left it. Then I think, so, I'm thinking of doing sports, but I have only bushes and trees, this is not good, I need protein, in short, I made birds and fish,and Japanese… what would sushi do? I looked at it-not bad. Then I think the animals need more … well, there are dogs, seals, sloths, pandas and other animals. You can have a cow, it gives you milk… the cheese is delicious… In short, I created all sorts of animals and French people-what would cheeses do. I looked – not bad – there are certainly 400 varieties of cheese, but I love all this chaos. Then I played Picasso and it turned out to be a platypus, but I also liked it, so I decided to keep it. Then I sat, thought about it, and decided to make people. So, I did it – I see it turned out badly. I think let me change something. Who drowned, who sent to space, who gave a monkey to marry, but it turned out that these creatures got out of control. Well, actually at the moment this is the only obstacle left. The moral is to create well, but do it wisely. So I became a sysadmin. More precisely, as my teacher said (yes, I have a teacher) – you are now a GOD (which stands for Guardian Of Data).
You will ask “where is the logic?”. She's not here, I'm just having fun at the end of the day.
I had a similar moment. When I got tired of everything: I couldn't really get a foothold in one job, I changed them like gloves.. I didn't have a place to live, and I wasn't particularly attached to my family ( well, I'm not one of those people who calls my mother and tells her everything that happened during the day. Alive and well? Well). I finally realized that I needed to change something when I managed to invite only one friend to my birthday party almost by force… As a result, I packed up in 10 days and went with my old friend to live in Vietnam, to the sea. I will not talk about life here, this is not the subject of the question.. But life has changed. There were friends, there was a personal life, there was a stable job. On the one hand, it looked like an escape. Either from herself, or from the place.. Maybe. Maybe sometimes you really need to give yourself a break from everyday life? Maybe the eye just “blurs” when looking at life, and you need to look at something else so that the old one gets new touches…
In fact, life is not difficult to change) the main thing is to decide..)
At first, from the very beginning of my childhood, I was quite sociable,I didn't follow my language very much(more precisely, it seemed normal to me at the age of 4 to send 3 funny letters to my grandmother(not by blood, but by age), who sticks and sticks “what's your name? Can you talk?”when I don't want to talk at all. Then my changes went in the direction of some kind of survival. I succumbed to the bullying of students 3 grades older than me.It was really hard at first,but then I had a near-fatal accident when I cut my arm and had a cast put on. I know that this is immoral somehow,but when I removed the cast in the hospital, I was asked for a long time, they say, ” what did you do with it???”. It was my survival weapon. I already understood about how the whole physics of fighting was, and I just tried to hit the person on the body with as much of the cast as possible, no matter where, because the cast was generally hard,and I was generally a little weak for 4 guys older than me. Well, in general, I had to survive like this until the end of the 5th grade,there was a climax when we already beat up each other so much,etc., that they stopped climbing to me,but since then I have a constant headache, because I was prescribed a delicious head. In general, then I went to another school and I was not very positive about people in general. At some point, I still found some kind of friends, although not in my class and not peers, and I finally found some interest in communication. It really became interesting for me to talk to at least someone only in class 7-8, probably because of this, despite all my efforts to surpass my peers in all three developments (physical,mental,spiritual) somewhere,I am inferior to someone in something . Because just a lot of the time I was all alone .The companies I visited were not very dependent on ratings,and therefore, in principle, they did not have to blush at anything,but they were very dependent on knowledge of ANY field. Just constant streams of information, if at least one of N people is interested or useful in it. Of course, information can be presented in different ways, and this is why I was amused when, for example, one girl from a class older than me retold a story with obscenities through a word,it looked quite funny,especially since she tried to use foul language in terms of the right environments. Then the development of oneself as a person began,and then a certain personality culture was planned, which is still alive today. I just liked being weird,I was willing to go to great lengths just to show “I am a being more powerful than you. I am not afraid of anything,I will do whatever comes into my head, the most important thing in life is not some kind of ease, but the time spent on action, because life is not eternal.”That's probably how my middle school went somehow. In the end, I began to strive for humanism. I didn't want to be above others any more,because when I really got what I wanted and it turned out that even without my immense esp,the person was much less alive than I was,it didn't bring me pleasure. More of a disappointment in myself. I wanted to control the processes taking place in society, so that everyone who wants to feel full-felt like them,for this I killed piles of hours in the 10th grade,early and mid-11th, and then I was disappointed in people again. I realized that I was all alone, that everyone who was dear and important to me just left me for all this time. Now I am at the stage of the concept of “where and how should I be”. I know that I will never be nice to everyone,but when I am terrible to everyone, it is even worse. When you are just starting something new for yourself, and no one supports you in this,and old friends also turn away. Quite a shame somehow, khem. This is where my story ends for now. I may be a lost person who just got caught up in too much negativity,but right now I'm just playing masks. I don't see myself as real. It's like my brain isn't at ease with me,because I'm not experiencing anything that I think I should be experiencing. I have moved away from all that I have created for myself in the form of illusions or truths. I just want to live a full life,I don't want to lose anyone else,and I don't want to get too many people. I don't crave any recognition,but I want to get along with the people that I would like to get along with,that I could get along with. That's why I'm looking for myself,I think about how the character in my life will act in this or that situation now, and I'll try to stick to other people's opinions as little as possible,but I'll just try to guess how to act so that everything would be fine with me. And damn it,but if my life continues like this, I don't believe I'll even live to be 40. All that I have just written is no more than 5% of my life. But I think from this you can understand that my life was not easy, even though I myself did a lot of reading.
With regard to obstacles, apart from misunderstanding, bullying, obsession of parents and threats from the devil don't understand who, I didn't seem to have anything serious. So far, it remains only to finish off the misunderstanding and get rid of the parents, then there will be no obstacles at all. Although I'm very young,but that doesn't mean I don't have to answer the question, does it?